Friday, February 6, 2009

The readers write..................

Ken Collier not only did a great job narrating, or as I should say, interpreting my work into the audio book of “Total Creep – A Guy’s Guide”, but he has come up with another great idea. I certainly never thought of myself in the same breath as Ann Landers, but Ken’s idea of my responding to readers and listeners about their personal experiences is a great one.
Don’t worry. If anyone understands, it is me who understands that an identity cannot be revealed. So at the most, I would use a first name (if common enough) and a state for identification. I already have a few to start this off:

Ron from Oregon writes:
“Dear I.C. – I loved hearing about your experience with seeing your girlfriend’s sister under her robe. But how could you be looking there that often without fear of being caught? My sister-in-law has a better body than my wife and I’ve been over when she has loose fitting pajamas on. I hadn’t want to risk it, but now I see where you are coming from on this.”

Dear Ron – Good question! It is like the book and audio says. There are 2 key elements. The first is to maintain a straight face. The second is to watch for opportunities and then be ready. You should also already know that she is not wearing a bra underneath. (If she is, it is not worth the risk to see a bra shot.) For example, maybe you notice her bending over by the sink to put dishes away. If you were nearby when she did, you could see down her pajama top. In that example, try to time it so that you are “helping” by bringing a couple of dishes over to her just as she would be bending over. Be coming around toward her, maybe saying something like, “Oh, here’s more” as if you are not trying to startle her. Like you are being helpful. If luck is truly on your side, you could keep bringing as she keeps bending over to load the dishwasher or cabinet and get multiple glances.

Of course, you might wind up having to then do this at home for your wife. But if doing so leads to some nice glances at her sister’s chest, it could be worth the trade off. If not in the kitchen, again, the point is to look for opportunities and then know when to pounce.

“Dear I. C. – I lost a good chance this morning. I was walking through the lobby of the office building I work in when a young babe walking a few feet ahead of me dropped something out of her wallet. She squatted down to pick them up, but she was facing toward me and I wasn’t close enough to see anything down her top. Then when I turned back and saw her walking away, her top was short and I probably could have seen down from behind. What could I have done differently? Jeff from Ohio”

Dear Jeff – Glad you read or heard the book, so you are aware of these opportunities. It’s tough to be specific based on what you have given me. But it sounds like you could have capitalized. That is a judgment call. It looks like you had a couple seconds to make a decision. If she was ahead of you when she dropped the items, you could/should have already known her blouse or shirt was short. Once you saw which way she was squatting down, you could have continued walking at the same pace behind her. Her focus would be on her dropped items and not by people in an office building lobby. Then you do the glance over as if you are curious about what dropped, if something broke, etc. Keep a straight face, or get that “wow, the babe couldn’t even hold her mirror!” look. Either would hide a “I’m seeing butt crack!” look, and you should be fine. But sometimes you don’t have that option to go behind. In that case, try to walk close enough to see down a top but only if you can do so without a drastic change in course. Again, depending upon the specifics of the situation, you could also go right over and offer to help, standing above her while you can hopefully see down her top. But, Jeff, I’m betting that you won’t miss the next opportunity that comes your way!

Readers or "listeners" are welcome to e-mail me here or via at and I'll do my best to help!

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