Sunday, November 29, 2009

A wise shopper

There is one positive to the crowded department stores on the busiest weekend of the year. Always a nice share of hot babes out and about.

I was checking out one babe on Saturday, probably around 30, who was clothes shopping with her husband. (I'm guessing husband since she was wearing a ring but it doesn't matter.) In this particular store I couldn't see to her fitting room, however, but I had a good vantage point to enjoy the scenery, and figured I'd wait and see how she would look in the low cut top she was trying on.

Sure enough, a couple minutes later she came out and was looking good, even though she had buttoned up the top she tried on. Couldn't even see any bra. I was about to move on, when she looked at her husband who was seated on the bench in front of the clothing rack I appeared to be looking at. She said something like "I like this, but my butt crack would show". Obviously, that caught my attention. She then proceeded to turn around and sit down with her back to her husband and reach back with one hand.

I'm pleased to report that she was right! She sat down to reveal a couple inches of butt crack and felt it showing. She obviously thought only her husband saw and that they were the only ones that knew. She had no idea that I was about 3 feet behind the hubby and I had just as good of a view as he did!

Granted, it was only a couple inches, but it was the timing that made this fun. Plus, I figure that if she was this concerned about butt crack showing that she probably is not one who walks around in public and lets her body show like so many babes do and bless us guys. This may have been a rare chance to see any of her goods, yet she made it so easy.

That was a break, since I had hoped to see some of what she had on top. It would have been worth waiting for. The break was her making that comment about butt crack just as I was about to give up on her and seek out another hottie to watch.

Moments later, it was on to walking past the cosmetics counters. I got the timing right on one of the employee babes wearing a loose top, and caught a glance as she was leaning over to get a bag for a customer. This one was wearing one of those wonderful skimpy bras that cover the nipples but very little else. This was basically the glance I was anticipating from the one that showed the butt crack. The babe at the counter wasn't quite as hot looking overall, but I think was better endowed by one cup size, so that helped.

So guys, the women are right about this weekend. It's a good time to browse the department stores.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Bottoms up in Palm Beach

Steve of SC writes:

"I enjoyed your story about your experience at that bar in Baltimore a few days back. It's always great when something like that happens in a bar or club.

But it is just as much fun if the (babe) is showing herself on purpose. I just got back from spending a few days in Palm Beach Florida. The other night I was in a bar (near the Breakers) after midnight. A cute babe came in by herself and seemed to know several of the people there. She had a couple of drinks and then started dancing, not paying a whole lot of attention to her jeans slipping down over her thong.

After another drink, a couple of the guys cheered for her, and then she got up, stood up on a chair, and pulled her jeans down below her rear end. She then pulled her thong down about half way in the back. Unfortunately, she stopped short of going the entire way down, but it was still a good view for all the guys as it was. Then she turned around and pulled the front of her panties down slightly, but not enough to see any (of the vagina).

Next, she pulled up her thong, pulled up her jeans, and lifted her top. She was wearing a very low cut bra. She pulled the bra out, but since she was on a chair none of us could see nipple. She stopped there, and let her t-shirt fall back over her bra. Then she sat back down.

That was quite a show for a bar. It was not a strip club by any means. After a few more minutes it became evident she wasn't going to do anymore. I went over and asked one of the guys at the bar if they had ever seen anything like that. The guy told me "She's in here all the time and always does that." He told me that he has heard she also does that at another bar nearby.

Why not go to bars and clubs to see naked chicks?"

Cool story, Steve. Sounds like you had a fun time in Palm Beach! And here I thought it was older women that frequented that area.

Anyway, while you and I have both enjoyed incidents with babes in a bar of late, it does not compare to what you can see if you are fortunate enough to be able to spy on babes from home or a safe location with binoculars. Seeing a flashing or an accident in a bar, as we recently have, is limited opportunity. While it is true you might have to wait a couple hours to see a babe at home, you might get a longer look as she comes out of the shower and towels off, changes clothes, or even walks around topless, bottomless, or completely naked.

That doesn't even count the number of times I have seen roommates or babes that have friends or relatives staying with them and you see multiple babes naked over the course of an evening or weekend.

In addition, seeing what we both saw in bars or clubs is a stroke of luck. Still enjoyable, but I'll take spying on countless hundreds of babes over the years any time vs. going to bars or clubs specifically to see nudity. And that includes butt crack from babes seated wearing low rise jeans.

Readers and listeners of "Total Creep - A Guy's Guide" are welcome to e-mail me with questions and experiences at at

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

A close shave for a Total Creep

The readers and listeners to Total Creep - A Guy's Guide continue to write:

Jerry of VA writes:

"Your techniques are amazing to me. I found a cute 20 something across the street and can sometimes see into her bedroom and part of the bathroom with binoculars. She is also on an upper floor and isn't that concerned about the blinds. I saw where some other guy asked you about watching ladies in very private moments. I have now watched this lady shave her (vagina) area twice. She puts on quite a display. One of the times after she finished she stood in front of the mirror to check how she shaved and then wash off a bit. As much as I enjoy that, I admit that I feel a bit guilty for watching such a private thing. How do you feel about it?"

Interesting question, Jerry. Also, I edited down your lengthy note since I wouldn't want to publish the specifics you gave about your building and the angles you have to the units across the street.

I'll directly answer your question by saying it is very wrong of us to watch when a babe is shaving herself there. But it's also wrong to be watching them at all in the privacy of the home. It just doesn't stop a lot of us guys from doing so anyway.

The only times I have looked away while spying on a babe were the couple of times I could see them actually on the toilet. I have looked away, glancing back every few seconds to be ready for when she stands up. Once she stands, I consider her fair game, and there is the moment in time when she is pulling up her panties, pajama bottoms, or shorts when I get to see her bottom.

As I think about it, the few times I have seen actually shaving down there have all been within the past 10 to 12 years. The first time I could see it I didn't realize what she was doing for a couple minutes. I have seen one that shaved very much like you described to me in more detail. She was leaning against the top of the sink and made it easy for me to see. The other babes I have seen do this usually sit, whether on a vanity chair, the toilet top, or on the edge of the bathtub.

There was one night I finally got to see a babe go naked for the first time after a few weeks, and then she sat on the edge of the tub to shave, but had her legs inside the tub. I suppose it was so she could wash the hairs down the drain, but I mostly saw her butt from behind the entire time. Luckily she was facing in my direction to towel herself off when she finished.

Actually, this is not something that I addressed in my book. I should have, especially since so many more babes shave there these days compared with decades gone by. (We're talking totally shaved or a landing strip, as opposed to a quick grooming.)

If you get to see this, and she is facing the other way, enjoy her butt. Chances are as soon as she is finished she will turn around. It may be to towel off, such as the example I just gave, or it could be to reach for something to put on.

However, I think there are some babes that shave there while in the shower, so there is no chance for us to see. If you are able to see into the bathroom and notice that maybe once every week to 10 days they take a longer than usual shower, it may be due to using that time to shave.

Another thing I find interesting about this is that a couple of the babes I have watched shave actually were wearing something on top. One I remember from a couple years ago would always wear a button down robe, and would unbutton from the bottom up, but keep it buttoned to below her boobs while having the bottom part wide open. Another would go bottomless and keep her t-shirt or tank top on while she shaved and then put her panties on for the rest of the night. In both instances, both had smaller boobs.

If any of you guys have seen a babe shaving and have had an experience different from the instances mentioned here, please let me know and we will discuss it.

You can e-mail me at at

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Babes from the balcony.......

Jerry C. of AZ writes:

“I loved listening to your book. I thought I was the only one who thought of spying on the babes with binoculars but I guess not. Your suggestions are amazing. You really did your homework. You did mention about spying from your balcony on some occasions. Isn’t that way too risky of being seen? There are a couple of college girls sharing a place down one level across the courtway from my condo. I can just barely see in there from my kitchen, but if I’m out on my balcony I can see into their living room and down the hallway toward the bathroom and bedrooms. Sometimes the blinds are open at night. I’m waiting on your answer before trying anything. Please help!”

Thanks, Jerry. I knew I wasn’t the only one and that’s part of what inspired me to share this information for guys like you that I knew are out there. Getting to your important question, the answer actually depends on a few variables. The examples I give in the book were from when my balcony was close enough to the nearby apartments that I could see in without using binoculars. That’s the best way. If are close enough to be able to do that, you can have your alibi in place. For example, you could have your phone in your pocket and, if “discovered” show how you had left your phone on the balcony earlier in the day and finally found it. You mentioned in your e-mail to me (which was edited down) that you are over 40 years old. Your alibi, if discovered, is going to be more believable than one from a teen guy or a guy in college.

You will also recall my experience with knowing to appear to be facing in a different direction. I was able to fool a neighbor babe who I watched come out of the shower and saw me standing outside into thinking I was looking somewhere else when I didn’t react to her. As the book describes, there are several ways to pull this off with success, and without binocs.

Without knowing the specifics of where you live, here are factors to consider. How much or how little light is there on your balcony after dark? If you can turn your balcony light off, there is your answer. If you cannot, it could be a problem. Are there neighbors on either side of you, as well as up above, who could easily see you on there at night? You can’t risk it if the nosy old lady next door could be washing the dishes and see you kneeling down with binoculars looking across the way.

If you can keep it dark enough, and have little to no fear of being noticed by neighbors, my suggestion is to wear dark clothing and maybe a cap, and go for it. If you can kneel down so that only your head appears over the railing or top of your balcony wall or fence and you can see in to their unit, you should be OK. You don’t want others to see you standing up if at all possible. Once I was able to use a plastic stool to rest a knee so I would be more comfortable when doing just that, since others could not see the stool on my balcony.

In the event there is too much light and/or others could see you, there is one other possibility. Go for odd hours. If these are college babes (or in that age range) chances are they will be out late on the weekends and during vacation time. Check your balcony during evening hours on a Friday or Saturday night. A quick glance into their place (if the blinds are open) will tell you whether or not they are home. Over the course of days or weeks, you should have no problem learning if or what lights they leave on when they go out. Also, scout your neighbors who can see you and try to get an idea when they go “lights out”. After you gather your information you would be in the situation to deal with this. Let’s say your neighbors go “lights out” by 11:00 on a Saturday night, and you can tell the babes across the way are both out for the evening. What you can do is to watch every few seconds from your kitchen (or whatever room) and see when their living room or hallway light goes on. I have even done this on many occasions while watching TV, reading, or online while waiting for a hottie to get home at night.

Sometimes roommates go out together, but not always. You might luck out and see one come home earlier and be all alone. Which means she doesn’t need to cover up when walking around to unwind from her night out. You might need to stay up later than you would care to, but it’s a way to see them naked. Once when I was faced with this situation, I lucked into seeing a babe come home more than once between 1:30 and 2 AM and saw her strip down completely both times. No way she would suspect anyone looking in at that hour. Little did she know that I couldn’t risk spying on her very often before midnight because of my neighbors at the time.

Also, you didn’t say if they live in the same complex as you or not. Either way, maybe you can find out where they park (if there are assigned spaces) and then you can check to see whether or not they are home. No one is going to question you walking through your parking lot, or if you can see it from a window no one will know you are checking. That’s still another way.

Let me know how this goes for you. Good luck!

Readers and listeners of “ Total Creep – A Guy’s Guide “ can write me at at The audio book is available through .

Monday, November 2, 2009

my Halloween treat

Some guys have politely pointed out that I tend to share my adventures from years ago even more than recent, so it’s time to change that.

It can be of benefit for a Total Creep to pay attention to what’s going on nearby and to know to watch for certain signs. This past Friday night (Oct. 30), I was in Baltimore on a business presentation, and had decided to stay there overnight instead of returning on a very late flight. However, I couldn’t see into any apartment or condo units or hotel rooms from where I was staying, so I ventured out to what looked to be a hangout type bar in the very nice downtown harbor area.

There were definitely some hot looking babes parading around. After about 20 minutes, I noticed an attractive babe walking toward the back corner where there was a small waiting area with chairs near the entrance to the bathrooms. She seemed to be staggering a bit and as she walked past where I was sitting, I could tell she had quite a few by that point. Looked like she was pretty drunk. Then I looked down and realized that her jeans were wet, as if she had either spilled a drink in the wrong place or possibly peed in her pants. Couldn’t tell which. She made it toward the bathroom door, which was out of my view.

About 10 minutes later, 3 guys came walking around the corner with that look on their faces of OMG. I’m not a lip reader but I could tell one of the guys said something like “Do you believe that?”. That look they had was the look that guys get when they have just seen something that turns them on. One had his mouth wide open. Knowing to recognize that look, I immediately got up from my seat and headed over toward the bathroom area.

I turned the corner by that waiting area and immediately saw what made those guys react as they did. There was the obviously drunk babe sitting in one of the chairs facing where people could walk by. Not only were her jeans still wet in the crotch area, but it turned out she was wearing button down jeans, rather than zipper. She was clearly too drunk and out of it to deal with buttons, or if she tried she and failed miserably. Miserably for her. She was sitting there facing out and without her jeans buttoned her fly was wide open. She either lost her panties, threw them out because they were too soaked, or she wasn’t wearing any in the first place. As a result, as I stood there looking, I could see her little landing strip in her natural dark hair color and about 2/3 of the way down her you-know-what!!!

Next I pulled out my phone and appeared to be fumbling to get a message so it would appear that’s why I went back there. She had her head down and was still in a daze, totally oblivious to what was happening. It was too bad she had a t-shirt on so there was no way to see anything on top, and I think she had a sports bra under that. But I continued as if listening to messages so it wouldn’t look odd for a middle-aged guy to be standing there while a young 20-something babe is exposed like that.

A couple minutes later, a guy and a girl came hurrying back to the waiting area. My guess is that the guy is her older brother and was with his wife or girlfriend. There was a bit of a facial resemblance. I’m not sure whether or not they were in the bar or if they were nearby and somebody called them to come and get the drunk girl. The other reason I’m convinced it was the brother was the look on his face when he saw her jeans wide open. He had more of a horrified look on his face. Had that been a guy friend or relative such as a brother in-law, no way he would have appeared horrified. This babe was attractive and there is no way a guy wouldn’t also enjoy the view I and the others got. The girl he was with was also horrified, but that’s understandable. She wouldn’t want a babe she knows, especially, to be exposed like that.

They both knew what was showing, but neither one was going to reach there and try to cover up. Which means she probably did pee in her pants. The girl wasn’t about to reach or touch that area, and neither was the guy. The girl stood in front of the drunk babe to try and block the view while making sure the babe had her purse, which somehow she did. (First time I noticed the purse!) The guy then went over toward the bar area and came back about 30 seconds later with a section of newspaper. He gave it to the girl who then put it over the drunk babe’s crotch area to cover up. But the drunk babe then took and tossed it down on the ground. The two helped her up, and got her to walk toward the exit, still with her fly open and her wet jeans around that area. After they got her standing, the girl then walked directly in front to block the view of others, while the guy was holding her shoulders and helping her from behind. They got her out of the bar.

I then came back around the corner as if closing my phone and acting like I had been waiting for the couple to get that babe out of there. By that time, at least 6 guys saw into those open pants.

Just as with my book, “ Total Creep – A Guy’s Guide “, there is a purpose to this story. The fact that I saw those 3 guys reacting as they did and knew to get over there and check is really what got me that little show. Especially after noticing that babe walking by who appeared to have peed in her pants. Otherwise I would have missed this.

My Halloween treat!

Readers and listeners to my audio book version are welcome to write me direct with questions and comments at @ The book is available at .