Monday, November 2, 2009

my Halloween treat

Some guys have politely pointed out that I tend to share my adventures from years ago even more than recent, so it’s time to change that.

It can be of benefit for a Total Creep to pay attention to what’s going on nearby and to know to watch for certain signs. This past Friday night (Oct. 30), I was in Baltimore on a business presentation, and had decided to stay there overnight instead of returning on a very late flight. However, I couldn’t see into any apartment or condo units or hotel rooms from where I was staying, so I ventured out to what looked to be a hangout type bar in the very nice downtown harbor area.

There were definitely some hot looking babes parading around. After about 20 minutes, I noticed an attractive babe walking toward the back corner where there was a small waiting area with chairs near the entrance to the bathrooms. She seemed to be staggering a bit and as she walked past where I was sitting, I could tell she had quite a few by that point. Looked like she was pretty drunk. Then I looked down and realized that her jeans were wet, as if she had either spilled a drink in the wrong place or possibly peed in her pants. Couldn’t tell which. She made it toward the bathroom door, which was out of my view.

About 10 minutes later, 3 guys came walking around the corner with that look on their faces of OMG. I’m not a lip reader but I could tell one of the guys said something like “Do you believe that?”. That look they had was the look that guys get when they have just seen something that turns them on. One had his mouth wide open. Knowing to recognize that look, I immediately got up from my seat and headed over toward the bathroom area.

I turned the corner by that waiting area and immediately saw what made those guys react as they did. There was the obviously drunk babe sitting in one of the chairs facing where people could walk by. Not only were her jeans still wet in the crotch area, but it turned out she was wearing button down jeans, rather than zipper. She was clearly too drunk and out of it to deal with buttons, or if she tried she and failed miserably. Miserably for her. She was sitting there facing out and without her jeans buttoned her fly was wide open. She either lost her panties, threw them out because they were too soaked, or she wasn’t wearing any in the first place. As a result, as I stood there looking, I could see her little landing strip in her natural dark hair color and about 2/3 of the way down her you-know-what!!!

Next I pulled out my phone and appeared to be fumbling to get a message so it would appear that’s why I went back there. She had her head down and was still in a daze, totally oblivious to what was happening. It was too bad she had a t-shirt on so there was no way to see anything on top, and I think she had a sports bra under that. But I continued as if listening to messages so it wouldn’t look odd for a middle-aged guy to be standing there while a young 20-something babe is exposed like that.

A couple minutes later, a guy and a girl came hurrying back to the waiting area. My guess is that the guy is her older brother and was with his wife or girlfriend. There was a bit of a facial resemblance. I’m not sure whether or not they were in the bar or if they were nearby and somebody called them to come and get the drunk girl. The other reason I’m convinced it was the brother was the look on his face when he saw her jeans wide open. He had more of a horrified look on his face. Had that been a guy friend or relative such as a brother in-law, no way he would have appeared horrified. This babe was attractive and there is no way a guy wouldn’t also enjoy the view I and the others got. The girl he was with was also horrified, but that’s understandable. She wouldn’t want a babe she knows, especially, to be exposed like that.

They both knew what was showing, but neither one was going to reach there and try to cover up. Which means she probably did pee in her pants. The girl wasn’t about to reach or touch that area, and neither was the guy. The girl stood in front of the drunk babe to try and block the view while making sure the babe had her purse, which somehow she did. (First time I noticed the purse!) The guy then went over toward the bar area and came back about 30 seconds later with a section of newspaper. He gave it to the girl who then put it over the drunk babe’s crotch area to cover up. But the drunk babe then took and tossed it down on the ground. The two helped her up, and got her to walk toward the exit, still with her fly open and her wet jeans around that area. After they got her standing, the girl then walked directly in front to block the view of others, while the guy was holding her shoulders and helping her from behind. They got her out of the bar.

I then came back around the corner as if closing my phone and acting like I had been waiting for the couple to get that babe out of there. By that time, at least 6 guys saw into those open pants.

Just as with my book, “ Total Creep – A Guy’s Guide “, there is a purpose to this story. The fact that I saw those 3 guys reacting as they did and knew to get over there and check is really what got me that little show. Especially after noticing that babe walking by who appeared to have peed in her pants. Otherwise I would have missed this.

My Halloween treat!

Readers and listeners to my audio book version are welcome to write me direct with questions and comments at @ The book is available at .

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